Fun/ Cool / Enlightening Stuff done:
Day 1
This day was filled with transporting ourselves to Delhi, which involved 2 cab rides and 2 plane rides, with a layover in Mumbai.
Needless to say, we were elated to finally get to our hotel, which was really quaint.
Day 2 – New Delhi
We spent the day in New Delhi, with a tour guide who wasn’t particularly open-minded, but who definitely knew a lot about India and who wanted to impart his knowledge upon us. This was mostly because, as we learned, there are only 200 tour guides a year who are approved each year in India; becoming a tour guide is both challenging and lucrative.
With him, we went tea/spice tasting at a place that has been in business since 1917, and which provides teas for places like Teavana and Harney & Sons. The owner there tastes anywhere from 400-500 different kinds of teas each day
We also went to some of the historic parts of Delhi, including a mosque and the Tower of Delhi, during which we were exposed to the great diversity of India, particularly its Hindu-Islamic presence. He let us know that the tower closed 10 years ago because people were jumping off it to commit suicide.
My absolute favorite part of the day was a Rickshaw ride through Old Delhi. The pictures and the videos really don’t do it justice, as it neglects the sensory experience: despite the muddy ground that seeped down the middle of the roads after the rain, the cows and goats that roamed the streets among the innumerable amounts of bikes, cars, and mopeds — the colorful saris and fabrics that lined the sides of the street along with the rich smell of spices and tea and incense that enveloped the narrow roads, seriously made my heart race.
Following this ride, our guide took us to this underground restaurant, which is apparently one of the best in Asia: my taste buds agreed. Over this meal, among other things, he talked to us about Indian society and his (generally positive) views on it, versus American society, which he categorized as being individualistic, and ‘always with headphones on’, trying to show off their music and isolating themselves from the rest of the world. We ended our time with him with some chai tea from a seller on the side of the road, which was definitely the best chai we had the entire time I was in India – this says a lot, since I averaged 3 a day…
Following our time with him, we had a long drive to Agra. Our driver recounted the story of how had to stop going to school because his father grew ill and he had to be the breadwinner. Despite my attempts to ask him what he wanted to do with his life eventually, he continued to say ‘no, mam, I don’t have any credentials that’s why’. His life was dedicated to his family. He continued to tell me about his love life, how he had a girlfriend but that his family did not know about her… nor did hers know about him. They are in different ‘class systems’, which means that they could never marry, so they see themselves in secret and await the (shortly anticipated) day when she marries a man who her family does see is ‘fit’ for her. That night, as most of the nights when he is out working, he slept in the car.
Day 3
The foggy morning didn’t realize my elusive vision of seeing the Taj Mahal at sunrise, but I did get to see the magnificent structure, learning how it took 22 years to build because each stone that was put into it had to be blessed. I was fascinated, mostly by the little things that made the structure so great: like the way that it was decorated with half of the flowers blooming and half of them wilting and dying, and the fact that it was built for the king’s wife to serve as her mausoleum – the grandest physical manifestation of love. I was grateful to have gone when I did, since its construction on a riverbank means that it will probably degrade and sink within the next 5-40 years.
The highlight of my day was probably feeding the cutest little things I saw all over India: squirrels.
The rest of our day was spent, very slowly, shopping for things that we didn’t need, but oh so beautiful. The colorful garments in India are like no other: as unexpectedly happens with nice vendors who genuinely want to get to know you, we were given a discount for our Kurtas (casual Indian dresses), at literally 50% off. He also offered us free alterations and some chai tea while we waited… moments that remind me of the beauty of humanity.
At night, we saw a different side of Delhi, at a mall that was nicer than the ones I mostly frequent in the states, from your Sephoras to your Louis Vuittons – it was all there. After realizing that we had stepped back into the ‘Western World’, we left for a night market that had closed down early because of the rain, finding a sari shop that was open during late hours.
The entire time I was in India, I was searching for a turquoise and gold sari – for some reason, I couldn’t seem to find one that I was particularly crazy about, but upon hearing my specifications, all of the vendors in the three different stores that I went to would literally bring out dozens of different options, which actually made the situation that much harder for me (to choose). Eventually, my friend, who didn’t even want a sari bargained so low for one (hoping that the guy would reject her offer and that we could leave) that she was the one who actually ended up with a beautiful turquoise and gold sari – and at a fantastic price!
Day 4
An early flight to Mumbai set the stage for a lot of things to do during the day and that evening – it turns out that we spent most of the day sitting and philosophizing on my Couchsurfer’s couch- and although we didn’t actually ‘do’ anything during the day, our afternoon was spent with great company, great conversation, great food delivered, and genuine, heartfelt laughter – what more could we have asked for?
Ashwin and his roommates were such fun-spirited intellectuals; as Bollywood filmmakers, they introduced us to the many challenges they face, as well as the many wonders of their world. Ashwin eventually took us to get henna tattoos, as well as out for some amazing exotic Indian ice cream, and helped me to get my shoes fixed for under 50 cents.
That evening, we stayed at the apartment, for a part II philosophizing session, as well as a Taboo game and apparently me passing out on the couch with a smile on my face.
Day 5
An indecisive morning led us to have a slow lunch near the apartment and a really eventful train ride into the center of Mumbai, where open doors led people to literally hang off the side of the crowded trains – numerous people dying each day because of train accidents (see my blurb on Indian trains at the end).
The intensity of the afternoon heat was just making me want to go inside, but we ended up giving in to the tour operator that insisted on following us around as we tried to get a picture of the Gateway of India. He sold my friend over, (and eventually me over with his 600 rupee per person (10$) ) 3-hr tour of a slum, a Gandhi museum, a mausoleum, and a Jain temple, which he said would have a festival going on as we spoke, only open to tourists on the day that we were there (which eventually turned out wasn’t true).
The most poignant parts of the tour were the visit to the Gandhi museum where we learned about the letters that he wrote to Hitler and Roosevelt advocating peace and how he adopted South Africa as his second home because he wanted to fight racial discrimination there.
The tour also led us to a slum where over 5000 pieces of clothing are washed each day, and where, converse to popular belief, only the men wash are allowed to wash the clothes (while the women fold). There are only a few washing machines in the area, most of which are owned by a single company, and that are only used during the monsoon season, when the pieces of clothing cannot be dried in the usual hour’s time.
From a beautiful park, we could see a skyscraper, which is the most expensive house in the world, which houses 6 members of a business mogul’s family, while employing over 500 staff.
The tour ended with a view of the Tower of Silence, which is where Persians in India leave dead bodies to be eaten by vultures and eagles, believed to complete the cycle of life for them (the mentality is that humans eat animals, and likewise, animals should be able to eat us).
The tour ended at a market, where we decided to split off after having expressed our interest in shopping for different things and only having two hours to do so. I ended up at this department store that looked like it had bangles that I would want. It turns out that the place didn’t have the nicest bangles, but it did have the nicest salesman I could’ve ever imagined; as he took me through the different levels of the store that he managed, Jaysh, as he was called ended up making me want to buy those bangles that I didn’t even feel like I liked. After asking him where he thought I could find some Henna, he volunteered to take me to the place where they would sell it, walking me through a beauty supply warehouse and even helping me to find the secret to the beautiful Indian hair: Mahabhringaraj Oil. He left me outside, asking me to return to his store when I was done shopping around to take a picture with him: I promised that I would.
I wandered through the busy streets, venturing into this wedding store that looks like it would have a Buddha statue that I convinced myself I was looking for; they didn’t have a Buddha, but the vendor directs me across the street, where she believes they will have one.
In the store, I am greeted by a man who offers me a discount on the 13 glass trees that I insisted on buying for my family, and in between our basic conversation about how I (to his confusion) was not Indian and about SAS/ what I was doing in India, his interest shifted to talking about astrology – how he was the Year of the Horse like my mother, and how I was a water sign (like most people on the ship because they were born during years that ended in 02 or 03), and how I was the year of the rooster – which led him to gift me a wooden rooster. Eventually he showed me a flyer for ‘reconnective healing’, which is exactly what he does – a few minutes later, I agree to a free session, which involves him simply touching my lower, mid, and upper back with one hand – I’m not sure if it was the Vick’s-like sensation that I got, or the literal transmission of energy (as heat) that did it, but immediately after he finished, I turned around to him being completely zoned out. I felt awkward ‘awakening’ him, so I stayed quiet, hoping that it wouldn’t be too long, since I had to meet my friends in 20 minutes. In the meantime, the store gets a phone call, which one of his employees in Hindi, but I definitely understood the word ‘meditation’, as he turned around to look at Anil who was still ‘out’ behind me. A few seconds later, he awakes, asking me how I feel, which I say ‘better, more relaxed’ – which I did, almost as one feels after a massage, although not quite as relaxed. He asks me if I can touch my toes, which I say that I can’t, but he insists that I try, which I do – and I do, in fact, touch my toes, with little to no effort. At this moment, my mind is blown, but it was only the start…
Anil, whose name I learned after he had ‘healed me’, offers to drive my friends and I to the station where we can take a train back to Ashwin’s apartment. At this point, I feel so comfortable with him that I agree, but emphasizing that I first have to stop by this man’s shop for a picture that I promised him. I realize that having wandered vastly away from where I had left my friends, I didn’t know where I was, luckily, my pre-2 hr self envisioned this happening, so I took a picture of the storefront where I had left them, and I also had a video of my friend at the department store, as he was helping me to try on some bangles. On my way to showing Anil the picture of the storefront, he sees the video, and I tell him that that is where I have to go first, and whether or not he knew this man. He excitedly replies, yes, emphasizing the fact that he does not know may people in the area, but that Jaysh is definitely one of the ones that he does.
He takes me to Jaysh’s shop, where both of them happily greet each other, as we exchange pictures and contact information for one another before we part- it must be that genuinely nice people really do find each other.
We leave the store, late to meet my friends, and as we’re walking through the crowded streets, he asks me who he should be looking out for, “blonde, Irish”? I say yes, at first thinking he had said something else, but then in awe at his correct guess, since that combination is pretty specific. A turned corner later, I point to the friend that he had described, who was sitting alone waiting for other friend Christina, I begin explaining to Nora what just happened before Christina shows up, clearly uncomfortable with the fact that I am with an older man. I tell them that he has offered us a ride, which they both seem to a bit uncomfortable with, but which they don’t question, especially after I hand them the bracelets that he made sure to get for each of them before we left the shop (which happened to match their (black and yellow/ blue and red, respectively) colored clothing perfectly).
A walk through a ‘short-cut’/ shady alley later, and we get to his friend’s car, where we pile on and begin a conversation that was literally out of this world. Christina and Anil discover their mutual love for conspiracy, guiding the conversation along with topics on how 9/11 was an inside job to how the fluoride that people are putting in our water is slowly killing us, to how people are being conquered by ‘Presstitutes’, how he survived the 2008 bomb in Mumbai, how all 5 of us but he were water signs, how pills can kill, and how he didn’t even know what made him want to get up from his chair and attend to me when I walked into the store…
As if the ride wasn’t enough, he remembered that I hadn’t eaten dinner, so he insisted on getting us to a nice French restaurant near his home, where I had an amazing cheese/balsamic crepe – of course, I didn’t expect him to pay for that, but at the same time, after all he had done, it didn’t surprise me.
Our Couchsurfer, Ashwin was more into seeing a film that night than going out, and when we brought it up to Anil, he agreed to let us leave our stuff at his place and to help us get to the airport the next morning. We ended up at his friend’s super nice apartment, where I immediately noticed that he collected snow globes ❤ we bonded over that and over the fact that we were vegetarians (our reasons being very similar), and just life in general.
He ended up giving me an Indian snow globe, after I told him that they were hard to find. Within 5 minutes, I drop it on the floor and crack it, water gushing out of it and onto his floor. He consoled me, saying that just that morning he had dropped a glass cup in front of his brother in law, and that his mother said that it was good luck? – Something like that. Either way, our conversations continued to flow, specifically amazed over the fact that all of our birthdates were conducive to the number ‘8’ – either being born on the 26th (2+6), on the 17th, (1+7), or on the 8th, (June 8th) like me.
We venture out of his apartment, headed towards this bar in a rickshaw, which they very cutely call ‘tuk tuks’, right after leaving the tuk tuk, I bump into this girl who looks very familiar to someone I know, specifically, my friend Laetitia, who I knew lived somewhere in India. I think to myself – ‘nah, it can’t be her. I probably just subconsciously want it to be her, since I know that she’s in India somewhere.’ As she’s walking away, the thought that it might be her, however elevates, and I take the chance to yell her name out… I am surprised to see that she turns around, at which point I run into her, and both of us, in shock, cannot believe what just happened. Not only am I informed that she lives an hour away from this encounter, but that it’s a Thursday night, and that the only reason why she’s out this late on a work week is that she went on a date to meet her fiancé’s parents. We caught up on each other’s lives, as well as our work in New York, and her wedding happening shortly in Australia. The strangest part about our encounter was that for the past few days, I had been telling both Christina and Nora about the fact that I had a friend in India whom I would love to see, but that I didn’t think we’d have enough time and that I didn’t know exactly where in India she was… that encounter answered my question!
After the bar, which closed down relatively early, we decide to go to a nearby club, right outside of the bar where I had bumped into Laetitia a few minutes back, I look up and there’s a florist shop called ‘June 8’…. Needless to say, after our discussion on everyone’s birthday, everyone understood why I was so shocked… only furthering my assumption that despite Anil saying that the United States is the new place for spirituality, India is still on a completely different level of spirituality that I definitely can’t wait to come back to.
Day 6
After an exciting time in Mumbai, we got back to Cochin, which is an especially calm beachside city. After venturing through the less touristy areas of the city, we ended up at a roadside shack for lunch, where I had the best food I had in India vvv.
After we advised him that he should have iced coffee and iced chai tea for the tourists, the owner insisted that they were great ideas, but that growing his business beyond his ability was not he was particularly looking to do. Maxim (as his restaurant was called) said that ‘everyone is looking for the money, but that he was just looking to live’.
Speaking of money: after failing miserably at finding my friend the maxi skirt that she had asked me for, I was drawn to an antique shop in Cochin. There, the owner of the store, an older lady insisted that ‘some times we can’t buy things that we want’ – speaking of this beautiful box that I was short $2 (for which I was definitely not going to retrieve more money, especially since it was my last 2 hours in India). I was actually quite impressed with her strong business mind, which reminded me a lot of my mother. She continued to tell me her story – how her husband died and how she manages the store — and of how she had seen Cochin grow and develop from one of the poorest places in India when she started 68 years ago to how it has developed. She ended up letting me keep the box even with the $2 that I was short and helped me to find my friend a skirt, which she gave me for free.
Here’s her email to me:
“ Hello Earlene,
Thank you for your mail and more so for your visit to our store, it was nice meeting you and I’m glad we could exchange a few thoughts and ideas. Very glad to note that you were impressed with what you saw while you were here. We have been here for almost 70 yrs now, and so have seen it all. This little town of ours has grown from scratch to a must visit spot today. Hard to imagine so! We have so many early and wonderful memories of it. It’s changed today and wonder what it will be like tomorrow. Must confess that we miss the old times and old friends.
Nice to hear what you had to say. Yes I continue to work in the shop, something I have been doing for almost 68 yrs now. It keeps me going as I have practically met the whole world from my seat here, just as I met you.
Nice meeting you. Take care and have a good life.
The dress looks lovely and the box was always to big favourite with the tourists here.
Bye.
Maisie.”
Best Food Had: Cheese Dosa;
Coconut Rice &
Coconut Vegetables
Favorite City: Mumbai
Favorite Thing Done: The drive through the narrow roads of Old Delhi on a rickshaw
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Interesting things learned about India:
Religion:
Muslims are buried with face towards Mecca
Muslims in India are allowed to have up to 3 wives
‘There are more festivals in India than days in a year’
The ‘red dot’ (Hindu) women wear on their foreheads represents the fact that she is married and that her husband is still alive
Cows are sacred and also everywhere roaming the streets because people aren’t allowed to touch them
Four religions have started in India – Hindu, Sikh, Buddhism, Jainism- but still 81% of Indians are Hindu
On Politics:
India is the only country in the world that has never attacked any country
The tower of Delhi, which was erected by one of the ancient Indian kings (Muhammad Ghori) who appointed one of his ‘slaves’ king before he left for Persia. Interestingly enough, in India, ancient kinds would appoint their slaves as king, but they would only be slaves if they were fit to someday be king.
In India it’s not illegal to beat your wife because ‘she’s your property’
On Society:
Ashwin’s roommate enlightened me on the difference between the peace movements in the Unites States, versus the peace movements in India. He said that the former was founded on freedom and peace but also lack of restraint (drugs and sexual liberty), whereas the latter was founded in religion, emphasizing peace through restraint and self-surrender.
There are 29 separate states in India with completely different cultures; In India, there are 332 + languages; with dialects it equates to over 18,0000 languages
In India, people are trained in yoga and meditation in school; there are approximately 20 different types of yoga; about 20% of population does yoga, but being the second largest country in the world in terms of population, this equates to a lot of people
A lot of the time, food is consumed with spoons
It is extremely rude to ask a man’s salary and a woman’s age
There is a low divorce rate in India because people are so socially involved in the marriages
How arranged marriages work: parents get pictures of girls whom they think are fit; their son sees the pictures and then they go meet the ones they like; the parents of the girl along with the girl meet the boy’s parents’ and they settle the arrangement together
It is rude to settle bills/ split money in public
It was such a pleasure for me to see signs of places that were ‘veg & non veg’, which made finding food for me that much easier
Most of the advertisements I saw in India were of what seemed to be un-photoshopped people, many of which were not the typical ‘thin/perfect’ models we are used to seeing in the West
The toilet seats always had the seat up—the small things that reminded me of the prevalence of the patriarchal society.
Perhaps it was the heat, but I noticed that most women have their hair clipped back for their daily routines; I hold that Indian women have the most beautiful hair in the world
National sport of India is field hockey; but cricket is more prevalent/preferred
Men and women are greatly separated. On the trains in Mumbai, men and women are on separate carts, unless the woman is the man’s wife. At weddings men dance with men – women don’t dance with men – even at the wedding the bride and groom/men and women sit separated from one another.
Sometimes, women are killed because men don’t want to pay divorce ‘maintenance fees’ – they are often burned, planned to look like a cooking burn accident
Hijrahs – transgendered 3rd gender people were accepted in Indian society until the British imposed their moral laws of making illegal anything and everything that wasn’t towards the ultimate goal of procreating and creating an environment that would eventually lead to sexual reproduction
Part of the (historical) reason why women wear henna at weddings is so that a female does not have to work for her husband until the henna fades away, which incentives them to make it as dark as possible, pouring lemon and sugar on it to preserve it
Aryuvedic medicine prevalent in cochin India ie the Keralan area — considered one of the official governmental healing methods: one’s health is connected to the universe — harmony of the mind, body, and spirit; Dosha = life forces that are in balance when one is healthy and is associated with 5 elements- fire, water, earth, air, either/ space. We each need different ratios of these forces. Stanford has started a homeopathy/ natural medicine program
White cars are very popular in India
Economics/Infrastructure:
Kerala, in the South is the wealthiest part of India, unlike most countries where the wealthier parts of the nation are in the north.
Abortions and sterilizations are free in India.
Only sons can enable parent’s reincarnation/inherit parent’s estate – females are seen as worthless humans who have to pay a dowry and are a burden to their families – There are many advertisements that say ‘spend 500 rupees now, save 50,000 rupees later’ – speaking of getting ultrasounds/abortions, instead of having to pay for a daughter’s dowry
Some women in the North of India go to the South of India to be surrogates for 9 months, leaving their families in order to get $5000
Trains in India:
People hanging on side of train- multiple people die each day — first class/ second class— women and men are separated
Lady drying her clothes on the train tracks
Jainism is one of the three religions founded in India (along from Hindu, Buddhism), which emphasizes not harming other beings, which means that one cannot step on the grass, or kill small bugs, or to eat animals, or root vegetables because root vegetables are often a source of food and habitat for many microorganisms
Men get on first- women and men together if husband and wife
Earlene at Sea 